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BEAR HUNTING
Andrea Porter
Submitted by William Topel
Jan. 20, 2006
The Pope took a couple of days off to visit Alaska for some
sight-seeing.
He was cruising along one of the campgrounds in the Popemobile when
there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A helpless
Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a "Save the Whales" / "Bush Lied"
T-shirt and a tree hugger hat, was screaming while struggling
frantically, thrashing around trying to free himself from the jaws of a
10 foot Kodiak grizzly bear.
As the Pope watched horrified, a group of Republican loggers came
racing up. One quickly fired a .44 magnum into the bear's chest. The
other two reached up and pulled the bleeding semiconscious Democrat
from the bear's grasp. Then using long clubs, the three loggers
finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their
truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back
seat.
As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give
you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there
was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic
environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is
not true."
As the Pope drove off, one of the Alaskan loggers asked his buddies
"Who was that guy?" "It was the Pope", another replied, "He's in direct
contact with God and has access to all God's wisdom."
"Well," the logger said, "he may have access to all God's wisdom, but
he sure doesn't know anything about bear hunting! By the way, is the
bait holding up, or do we need to go back to town and snatch another
Democrat?"
boandrea13@yahoo.com
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